Heading to church

After this photo was taken, this sloth headed to church to pray for the luck he'll need to get through today.

It may be a hatchback, but it's got a sunroof.

And sunroofs mean new pose possibilities.

Still terrible at photoshop.

Fraud Sloth doesn't know when to give up.

A Fake.

This mangy sloth couldn't afford even this rundown car so he photoshopped himself with it. Unfortunately for him, he's terrible at photoshop and all the other sloths know he's a fraud.

Some sloths don't know when to let go.

Although this sloth totaled his car, he still can't stop taking photos with it.

Another sloth, another car.

I still have no idea why they're doing this, but they are. And until they stop, I'm going to document it.

This sloth pimped his ride.

This practice is looked down upon by most sloths. Grandiose posturing is not their style.

Sloth Cartoon (no cars)

The reality is that they will be extinct soon.

And they are terrible at grammar.

Sloth and car.

Every kind of Sloth is getting in on the action.

Sloths that look like Evan Aaseng

Here are some sloths that look like Evan Aaseng:

Sloth-inspired Car accessory

Spotted in the window of a sloth's car.

Cool MC Sloth has a riddle.

Cool MC Sloth: What do you call a Minnesota Viking with a Super Bowl ring?

Contemplative Sloth: That is quite the tough riddle. Let me ponder it for a while.

Cool MC Sloth: A THIEF!

(this joke makes Vikings Fan Sloth sad because it is true)

Sloth in a Box: Or BRETT FAVRE!

Cool MC Sloth: Right on, Sloth in a Box. Let's go take some pics of us and our cars and then drink some accountant's beer.

Sloths of all economic classes.

(a poor sloth gives a car a test drive, even though he has no intention of buying it)

The trend taking over the sloth world is reaching popularity with all sloths. Even those that cannot afford a used car. This poor sloth pictured above does his best Tawny Kitaen in a used car lot. The sloth considered buying the car with his 3rd credit card but decided not to at the last minute as he stated, "In all seriousness, I'll probably lose it anyway." Smart move as sloths seem to lose a lot of things. Scientist believe this is due to their pessimistic outlook on life.

An aside...

Research also shows that sloths prefer the company of accountants because they have similar hairstyles.

(top: accountant, bottom: sloth)

(back to sloth and car pics tomorrow, because accountant pictures are boring.)

The second aspiration of all sloths.

It seems that taking pictures with their cars is not the only way sloths aspire to spend their time these days. Recent discoveries show that since sloths have become more mobile they have taken to partying with accountants. Most scientists conclude that the reason for this is simple: While sloths now have more access to the world since gaining transportation, they are not ready for a faster-paced lifestyle. Henceforth, partying with the likes of accountants keeps new stimulants to their environment relatively low.

(Above: a sloth finishes a photo shoot and takes off to go to an accountant party.)
(Below: a sloth parties with an accountant)

Sloth Rumor.

While it's yet to be confirmed, it seems that fantasy football has something to do with sloths' fascination with taking these pictures. If true, it still seems to be a "chicken or the egg" scenario. Do they take these pictures because they're terrible at fantasy football and need something to make them feel good about themselves or are they terrible at fantasy football because they'd rather spend all of their time taking photos of themselves with their cars? While it's still just a rumor, it's hard to determine. What's not hard to determine is how awesome the latest picture of a sloth and his car is.

also, in regards to Fantasy football....




Party Time! Excellent!

This guy.

We found this sloth in a desolate area of Iowa. As they have been acquiring used cars, they have been able to easily migrate to wherever they please. Turns out the natural light in Iowa is ideal for taking pictures of used red sedans. This guy has chosen to go with the "look how cool and tough I look leaning against my car" pose. Still no news on the sloths' reasons for taking these photos.